The 3 “P’s” of the Working Parent: Patience, Permissiveness and Pizza

by Samantha on May 29, 2011

When I first started this blog, I posed the question as to whether “having it all” was really possible. Like all of us, I’m still trying to figure that out, though I must say that the answer is not tipping on the positive side.
If you’re like me, you subscribe to the “3P Philosophy”, and you do it regularly. For the uninitiated, I am talking about the framework upon which I base my complete parenting paradigm: ” The Three ‘P’s’ of the Working Parent”: Patience, Permissiveness and Pizza.”
Let me explain.

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Patience - Any parent will tell you that an abundance of patience is necessary when trying to balance work, family and life in general. The kids are screaming, the dishwasher is broken and extreme exhaustion set in days ago. You want to hold your eyelids open with toothpicks due to the lack of sleep that you have not been getting for the past month, and still you persevere.

“Patience will see you through this”, a kinder, older and wiser soul tells you (okay, it’s usually Grandma). You know that she would never lie to you but you can’t see the forest for the trees. Yet you are forced into being patient, even against your will, as there is no other alternative. You have to continue taking care of your kids, working to pay the bills and doing laundry.

Permissiveness - Isn’t it amazing what you will let your kids get away with when you are exhausted and overwhelmed? Despite your best efforts, you either use a combination of tactics to get them to behave, or throw in the towel and say “Sure! You can have a third cookie,” just to provide yourself with a few sacred moments of peace. You beat yourself up for having such a laissez-faire attitude towards parenting but frankly, it has become a method of survival in this crazy, crazy world that is parenting.

Pizza - Pizza encompasses all of the main food groups. I said so, therefore it must be true.
In all seriousness, the guilt that accompanies parenting is more compelling than other emotions and for the most part, is harder to shake. There is so much that is riding on our decisions for our children, from the type of person that they eventually grow up to be, to how they will treat others, and whether they will be liked as individuals. Is it any wonder that we’re stressed about it? 
There is no definitive “How-To” guide for parents. While there are many sources of support and suggestions as to what is said to be the “right” way to do it, the jury is out with respect to which philosophy is the most effective or least damaging. We all have our own opinions on how we should raise our kids and although our instincts and gut feelings guide us in our decision-making, we second-guess ourselves nonetheless. It often feels like we can’t win.

To this end, for most of us, “The 3 ‘P’s’ of the Working Parent” is more of a contingency plan than a well-thought-out strategy about being the best parent that we can be, and making the most sensible decision for our kids. Because in spite of our best intentions, we are tired, really tired and often don’t know what else to do.

So my questions today will focus on the “3 P’s of the Working Parent.” 

Do you follow this strategy?

Do you have any additional parenting tips that help you get through the craziness of parenting?

What are the most challenging aspects of parenting and how do you address them?

Does pizza cover all of the main food groups? Please answer the poll in my right sidebar!

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{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

Holly Ann May 30, 2011 at 2:45 am

Have I mentioned lately that I like you? Because I really do. You're funny. You're honest. And you remind me not to be so damn hard on myself. Thanks!


Samantha May 30, 2011 at 2:54 am

@Holly Ann
Goodness, gracious, Holly - I'm * blushing*

Thank you so much for the kind words of support. I can't tell you what they mean to me, as putting myself out there, warts and all, was something I wasn't sure I wanted to do when I started this blog.

Despite my trepidation and fear of exposing my less-than-perfect parenting skills, I decided to go for it as I figured at this point, I had nothing to lose. The house was already a mess, the laundry wasn't done and the people who knew me already knew this. “What the heck,” I thought, as it can't hurt to put it out there and see if anyone else was struggling, as I was, with trying to be that perfect parent (that I realize doesn't really exist).

Anyway, I see that I'm going off on a tangent but what I really want to say is that I so appreciate that I can make people laugh and bring some entertainment and possibly help and support to others in similar situations. There's strength in numbers, I was told. Might as well support each other, even if it is virtually.

Thanks again :)


Melanie May 31, 2011 at 4:07 pm

I think pizza can totally cover all the food groups (as long as you pick toppings). Besides it's a great way to sneak in veggies without kids noticing!


Samantha May 31, 2011 at 4:14 pm

@Melanie You're absolutely right, Melanie! There's something to be said about double cheese and sauce topping to cover up the broccoli and spinach underneath. I guess this would be a problem with a “white” pizza?
Thanks for commenting!


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